CY and Company want to wish you love on this self learning and self caring journey. We support our community and our following by giving a safe space to talk about the hard things. Loving yourself is the best gift you can give to yourself. Hopefully we can help you start your voyage with what we did each day to help us send love inwards. As we walk through life, we pick up more and more each day but sometimes forget to put them down. This can relate to working extra hours at your job, or babysitting for your neighbour, sometimes it’s just that our parents are getting older and we aren’t ready to come to terms with their age. These are all things we hold close to the heart and it is our duty to figure out what to put down, pass along to others, let go of or not pick them up in the first place. This self-loving journey is made for you, our reader and friend, to know you are not alone.
Day one: Take inventory
I sat down in my living room and gave myself the opportunity of no distractions. It was quiet in my apartment and I live alone. I wanted to talk out loud and to journal what was happening so I started by making a list of all my fears. I wrote and whispered about the stresses in my life that were weighing heavy on me. There is a lot happening and sometimes it’s nice to have it all laid out in front you. I listed them one by one; one of my family members is sick, my fear is losing them. Then I gave myself the opportunity to turn it into something positive. Even though they were sick, I spent time with them and we built a stronger bond and love for one another. I kept going; work is stressful and I’m in the process of figuring out where my career is heading. Then I thought, at least I’m working on a plan and eventually, slowly I will get there.
Take some time to sit with yourself for 30 mins, one episode of a show, and take some inventory. Write it down or say it out loud and you will feel lighter after you let it out, I promise. Change the direction of your fear and be open to seeing that even though you may have fears you have the opportunity to experience it how you choose.
Day two: Forgive yourself
This is one of the most difficult things for me to do. Sometimes I hold onto the silliest mistakes from my day and I think about it on a rotating mental belt, turning it around and around and making up fake scenarios. Why did I have to stop for coffee? It made me 10 mins late and my meeting had to be pushed back. I had a really rough night and tossed and turned and needed that coffee to give me some extra energy, I could have chosen to wake up early but I didn’t. I am usually never late for anything and so I decided to forgive myself and let it go at the end of my day.
It might be more difficult to let go and forgive bigger mistakes that have been made in your life but know you’re not alone. You might think that you’re the only one that messes up and the outside world is made up of perfect humans, but you’re wrong. We all make mistakes. We all falter once in a while. We are allowed to make these mistakes because it is meant to teach us that we are learning. By holding onto the mistake and going over it again and again we build pressure in our souls. This deep intense pressure to uphold all your expectations and everyone else’s opinion on it. This only supports the shame we think we deserve. It keeps us thinking we are some how unworthy or less than. This is not true. You are worthy and deserve to be forgiven, so start by letting go and being an imperfect human.
Day three: You and only you make all the decisions in your life
This seems like an easy lesson to learn so I sat down once again and thought about all the terrible moments I didn’t love myself. After that break up that went so terrible or when I moved to another city by myself to start over, I felt lost. All these events made me feel alone, but they were my choices. I chose to date the guy who I knew wasn’t good for me and I made the decision to move. These were more lessons I needed to learn and decisions I made for myself. What I decided to do after leaving that guy, was to love myself and learn to only allow people to treat me how I want to be treated. I learned that moving away is hard but it pushed me to get out of my head and explore and become resilient.
Look around to your circle and see who you have decided to keep close to you. These people influence you but they never make your decisions, that’s your job. Know that each morning you wake up and get out of bed you decide if you will have a good day or a bad one. You decide how you are treated, how you want to live your life and how much love you share with the world.
Day four: Create expectations for yourself
Life dissatisfaction has been studied to show that the most unsatisfied people are the ones on autopilot. These are the people who are just showing up and forgetting that they can build. Expectation has always been a loaded word for me. It is something that people presume will happen, or expect to feel a certain way or imagine something that they think their partner will pick up on. You are allowed to create expectations that will propel your life from what it is now to what it could be.
Write down your goals and dreams, make a plan of action that will change your life from sitting in your office to working your dream job. It will help create opportunities that you might have missed with your head down.
Day five: What are you thinking about?
We have about 70,000 thoughts that fill our mind each day, and 90% of them are on repeat from yesterday. Walk the dog, take out the trash, workout, your to-do list can go on and on and so can your thoughts. Watch them. Notice what you think when you face difficulty in your day. Traffic’s bad? Who are you blaming? Your boss moved up your deadline? Will you be up for the challenge or spin it into a sob story? Each thought you have can either negatively impact you or positively change your outlook.
Try to go a whole day and be present in your thoughts and situations that go on. See where you can bring positivity.
Day six: Meditate
I have since put a reminder in my phone for exactly 8pm every single day to meditate for five whole minutes. Silence. Letting my thoughts wonder, sifting through my day, or letting fade away by picturing a boat slowly rocking side to side at sea. Your mind is the sea, it can be rough and filled with waves or calm and serene enough to enjoy the sunset.
Make it short and sweet and give yourself the opportunity to look within and disconnect from the outside world and turn it all inwards.
Day seven: Appreciate your body
You are a hard-working machine. Building, lifting, running, typing, you name it and you do it five times faster than the other guy. I started this practice late in 2019 and began to thank my body for giving me the strength to lift that weight I was striving toward. I thanked my body for being strong enough to hold me up. I realized that without my body, I would only be a consciousness and it is the vessel that allows me to be apart of this world.
No matter what difficulties you face, this one body and this one life is all you have. Start by loving it and appreciating all that you are and all that you add to this world. You matter and you deserve this self love because once you love yourself, everyone will see that glow.
We at CY and Company show our self-love by buying special gifts for special occasions. If you are lucky enough to have someone, remind them with a beautiful piece of jewelry how much they mean to you in this month of love.
Writer & Lead Content Strategist, CY & Co.
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